“25 Things I learned In My 20s” - Part 1

I chanced upon this article entitled “25 Things I learned In My 20s” and there were a couple of points that hit me hard. I was hoping I could write them all in one post but time and inspiration is not on my side. At the rate that I have been writing, I'd be probably be able to publish this by early next year. hahaha. So I thought I'd just post them one by one. Here goes..

 “ The rumors are true: your metabolism does slow down as you get older! That means if you’re still eating whatever you want, there’s a good chance you’ll start to gain an awkward amount of weight. It won’t be too drastic but your clothes will start to hang differently on your body and you’ll feel an overall feeling of unattractiveness. Start to be conscious of what you eat and strive to live a healthier lifestyle if you want to get your teen body back. (Let’s be real though, that might not ever come back.)”

I’ll go ahead and admit that I am very much insecure about my weight. I try to be nonchalant about it but deep inside I'm a big hunk of insecurity. In my late teens and around my early twenties, I’ve been so obsessed about gaining weight. Seriously. I've done slimming pills (bad, I know), excercise, no rice diet, etc. It clearly doesn't help that I have an extra sweet and salty tooth plus I am much too lazy to even bother exercising (not to mention these fabulous genes I’ve been blessed with). LOL.

But aside from my snail-paced metabolism, these days I’ve been noticing that my figure doesn’t really bother me as much as it used to. I mean, I dont like that other people point out that I’ve gained weight (ugh, this irritates the heck out of me!!note to people: commenting about a person's weight over and over and over again is RUDE.), but when I’m alone and I look at myself in the mirror, I actually like what I see.

I like that I'm curvy (nope, not really a fan of stick thin girls. no offense, just a personal preference), I like that I have hips and boobs and an ass (the husband agrees. hahaha). In short, I actually like my body now even if it probably wouldnt hurt to lose about 10-15 pounds. It's so weird that this is coming from somebody who was super obsessed about losing weight a couple of years ago but hey, maybe acceptance comes with age? (oh no! Does that mean I’m old???) hahaha.

I really just hope the people around me (hello relatives! *wave*) would stop with the weight comments. HELLO! I'm not obese, duh. plus even if I was, it's still RUDE.

the past few weeks

So many things have happened for the past few weeks, my mind can barely keep up. I want to write them all down before I forget but I seem to have been having a hard time forming sentences with coherent words. But anyway, here's me trying:

JAMES AND WORK

James has been applying for jobs for the past few weeks. He went to three companies passed everything except for the final interviews. It breaks my heart seeing him down and upset, especially because I was the one who pushed him to try and enter the call center world. He is not the office type, I've known this for years I told him to go for it. No harm in trying, right? Well, I was wrong. 

He would beat himself up for not passing. He was so hard on himself. I kept telling him it's fine and that's it's normal especially for someone who has zero experience. For me, it's amazing enough that he got through all the exams and intial interviews but he has been so hard on himself lately that it really kills me. Deep inside I knew he wanted to start his own food business and that's where his passion is but it's a huge risk for the both of us and I was scared as heck. 

But seeing him so sad made me realize how I love him too much to put him through office hell. I spoke with my mom about it and she encouraged me to encourage James to go for his dreams. Funny cause technically the wife should have been more supportive than the mother in law. LOL. so anyway to make the long story short James and I discussed it and I promised that I was gonna stop pestering him to join the corporate world. Enter: THE BUSINESS.

THE BUSINESS

We started out with the idea of selling cooked food, a mini restaurant of sorts, then narrowed it down to a more specific concept. We've started preparing already, scouted places (found one already actually), armed ourselves with loads of information about the business, canvassed for equipment, trolled the web endlessly for suppliers, etc. We were basically ready to open in a few weeks when THE CALL came.

THE CALL

It was I think a Saturday afternoon when one of the companies he applied to called him and asked him to report for training this week. He was happy, and I must admit it was a good opportunity. They call it Near Hire Training, meaning he wasnt hired, but they were training him to get hired. I'm not sure how I feel about it. I should have been ecstatic but I honestly do not want to see that sad little face again, so much so that I was willing to take that huge leap of starting the business. 

Well, he seems to be enjoying himself for the past few days and he seems really excited about the prospect of getting hired. Me? I dont know. I'm trying to be the supportive wife and at the same time I cant stop this nagging feeling that he's doing all this not because he truly wants to but it's just all because of me. The last thing I would want him to think is that he failed me. It honestly doesnt matter anymore if we'll go through financial hell or if we have to delay having kids for the next few years. I just want him to be happy in what he does. Really, really happy.

--

Now what about me? What's up in my world? Well, I've had a pretty good work week last week. Appraisals have been discussed and yes I got a pretty good salary raise, far more than what I was expecting. It's nice to see and hear that they actually appreciate the work that I do. 

This job is far from being perfect but I actually like what I am doing and I like the people I work with (well most of them. LOL.) So yeah I guess I'm basically happy where I am right now career-wise. But then again, I keep having this feeling that I have to try and step out of my comfort zone. Maybe it's about time I start taking risks. You'll never know, right?  We'll see what the rest of the year brings, I guess.

Well I guess that's it for now. 'Til the next update. :)

a turning point

A few minutes ago, James and I decided to stop trying this year and just focus on being financially stable. I know some people will definitely question our decision, heck I sure as hell did, but the husband had a point: would we really want to have a child at a time when we're not even sure where we'll get the means to provide for another person? Our current financial status is just good enough for the both of us, so adding another person at this point may just not be the best timing.

And it's not really like we're gonna start using contraceptives or stop taking our vitamins, or anything like that. We're basically just gonna try to stop obsessing about it and just enjoy our time together.

I know, seriously easier said than done, especially for someone like me whose middle name is Obsessive Compulsive but I believe God will provide at the right time and only He knows when that right time is. In the meantime, I'm gonna try my hardest to patiently wait.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

note to self

note to self:

" joy comes to those who are willing to let go of the familiar and happily embrace the unknown."

Sent from my iPhone

repost: 10 days after - Lessons Learned

it has been 10 days since the wedding and we have yet to fully recover. although things didn't go perfectly, I believe I had the wedding of my dreams. most of our suppliers did phenomenal, I say most because one of them really stressed everyone out. (more on that later).

married life has been fun so far. the past 10 days have been a blur of adjustments, compromises and real life changes. I am overly happy and I really could not ask for anything more (well except for a new phone, hahaha). we planned the wedding for more than a year and yes it's true what they say that everything passes by so fast, sometimes I actually wish I could press rewind and experience it all over again just so I can relish the feeling of getting married one more time.

former brides and now wives have been telling me I better enjoy the preps cause I'll miss it for sure. well so far I havent missed it yet. I dont miss the stress, the sleepless nights, the so emotional crying-over-just-about-anything days and oh yeah, the stress. i am over-to-the-moon happy that I dont have to deal with never ending schedule changes and pasaway suppliers (okay, I only had one pasaway supplier).

i want to relive the wedding, not the preps. now that I have the time to look back, I actually think one of the reasons why I was so happy on our wedding day (well aside from the fact I'm finally marrying the love of my life), was because the preps were finally FINALLY over. haha. :)in 19 months of prepping (is there even such a word?) I have learned a few stuff that I do want to share them with the rest of the brides out there:

1. It is never too early to start planning.
we started the whole preparation thing April 2008 and we did get a lot of "ano ba yan ang aga aga pa masyado.." and "sus, ang tagal pa naman pala. madami pang pwedeng mangyari.", etc. we also got a lot of snickers and giggles behind our backs (some even not bothering to hide their amusement) everytime we'd tell them our wedding would be in December 2009. I admit I got hurt the first few times I heard their comments, but I just consoled myself with the thought that it's our wedding anyway, not theirs.

because we planned months ahead, we managed to save a lot. we were able to get the previous rates of our suppliers. we were also able to get the suppliers we wanted. we had the time to canvass, research and actually meet them before deciding. we had the time to run around bridal fairs without the pressure of actually needing to book somebody. preparing early is one thing I feel thankful we did, most especially since we had a December wedding. as all us brides and former brides now, December is the new June so it really pays to start early.

2. To each his own. Take every feedback with a grain of salt.

FACT: brides (and grooms) are all different. yes some have the same taste, the same fashion sense, the same ideas, but at the end of the day, bottomline: we're still all different. what worked for one couple may not necessarily for you, thus there's no point in comparing and in raising hell when one supposedly well-loved supplier fails you. there's no point in asking: "bakit sa kanila pwede, samin di gumana?" again: EVERY WEDDING IS DIFFERENT.

w@w has been a wealth of information and has truly guided us in choosing our suppliers. the feedback part is great but early on I realized never to rely on it so much, to the point that the feedback will be the main reason why we're hiring a supplier. yes, research on your prospective suppliers but please, learn to trust your own instincts as well.

and just the same as good feedback doesnt guarantee good service, bad feedback also does not automatically mean you'll get bad service. like in our case a lot of people had really bad things to say about our videographer, but heck when we met him, we trusted him off bat. we went with our guts and he has given us the best prenup and onsite videos ever. the key to getting great suppliers is trusting your own guts. really.

3. Let Go. Have fun.

I was adamant on letting go of all the wedding stress a week before and had it not been for the pasaway supplier, I would have succeeded. nevertheless, to this day I still pride myself for letting go of everything on the wedding day itself. some people disappeared from the guestlist ( my fault, by the way.)? whatever. the avp I worked so hard on didnt play? dedma. my designer who was supposed to bustle up my gown so I can dance during the reception didnt even show his face? haay. ipasadiyos nalang.

I was able to enjoy every single second of the wedding because I did not allow myself to stress over the little things. I never prayed for a perfect wedding, all I ever wanted was to be able to enjoy it and I got just that, thank God. The glitches actually made it more special and endearing and funny and memorable. To this day I am so thankful that not only did we have reliable suppliers who were able to ride through the glitches, more than that I am so grateful that God allowed me to let go and I did.

it has been 10 days and no, I dont have post-wedding blues. I'm just happy, really really happy. :) Best Wishes to all brides out there. keep visiting this blog for more wedding inspiration pictures. :)

take care,

Mrs. Maan Rodriguez- Alonzo :)

--
I am a witness to the suffering of my people.
I am a chronicler of truth and a catalyst of change.

-The Scholastican-