whew. I have barely gotten over the last one and yet I am about to be faced by another one. James is gonna resign from his job. The decision is made, I can't do anything about it.
On one hand, I feel so bad for him cause I really saw that he did try his heart out it's just that maybe he really is not the office type of guy. He's more into labor intensive work, which is really hard to come by in this country. I also think he has the guts and the heart for business, which I dont have. I'm not a risk taker, which is a main requirement in starting a business.
On the other hand, like I said I am afraid of taking risks and resigning from a job without even a concrete plan on what to do next is a huge, gargantuan risk for me. It's scary, to say the least.
I am sooo tempted to demand James not to resign but it really breaks my heart every time I see him down and out just because his job makes him feels so inadequate. I dont think anyone should suffer that much, at least not somebody I love to bits. Plus as I said he has the heart for business, so who knows maybe he'll get his long-awaited success in that area.
James is a brilliant, brilliant man. He's very smart, he comes up with great ideas plus he's very nice to people (generally. LOL.) He wont admit it, but he has the heart of a teddy bear. He would seem rough and tough on the outside but his heart easily melts. We "discuss" a lot because we are both so opinionated and we're always seem to be on opposite ends. It irritates me but every time we "discuss" I would always end up amazed at how he looks at things. It's so different from mine. (please dont tell him I said that. hahaha).
His brains, his heart plus his risk-taking, i-am-not-scared-of-anything attitude I think would make a good businessman. And as my mama said it's the best time to take risks. We're still young, we don't have kids yet, so basically the only thing we have to lose is our pride and our money. Money, we can eventually earn again and as for pride? Everybody needs a good fall every now and then. That's what makes us human. That's what makes us appreciate the life that we have.
So anyway, as scared as I am, I am determined to support him in whatever he wants to do. It's his turn. He humored me by trying to work in an office, I think it's about time I give in to what he feels he wants.
Dear Lord, please help me find the strength, the patience and most importantly the faith to be able to get through this.
Hon, if in case you'll come across this post, (which I highly doubt), I just wanted to say I love you so much and I believe in you with every single cell in my body. Let's do this.
